'Lord of the Rings' — the musical?

Now we have "The Lord of the Rings," the theatrical juggernaut that had its world premiere in Toronto flaunting its $23-million price tag.

Featuring such great songs as:

"What Kind of Troll am I?"

"Seiging in the Rain"

"Try to Dismember"

"Me and My Gollum"

"Consider Your Elf"

"Old Man Rivendell"

"Maim"

"Gimli a Kiss to Build a Dream On"

"Helm's Deep in the Heart of Texas"

"Fro-Do-Re-Mi"

"Paint Your Dragon"

"Shelobs Me"

"Don't Ents Me In"